Author Archive
Holger Osieck - The Socceroos New Boss
by The Stinger on Aug.15, 2010, under Australian, Football
This past week the Football Federation of Australia announced the successor to Pim Verbeek for the head coach position with the Socceroos, Holger Osieck. Who? No, seriously. Who the hell is that?
Well apparently after a mediocre playing career, he worked his way up to being Franz Beckenbauer’s assistant/clipboard monkey at Italia 90. Oh by the way, he is German, not Dutch so that is a step in the right direction. After winning a World Cup with Germany he then descended into lower league club football before landing the top job with Canada.
Osieck managed to win a CONCACAF Gold Cup in his time there but was unable to take Canada to the World Cup. He then joined FIFA in 2004 as the chief of their Technical Department. Hopefully he still has some contacts there that might help us win the hosting rights for the 2022 World Cup.
He rejoined the coaching ranks in 2007, taking over J-League side Urawa Red Diamonds. He took them to the 2007 Asian Champions League title. But does that make him a good coach when he was dumped early in the 2008 season for a poor start? I am not convinced by his credentials yet.
However, he is now our manager and he promises us that he will usher in a new generation of Socceroos. At least we newspapers around Australia will be able to have such witty headlines as “Ossie leads us into the World Cup.” Assuming we make it.
Barclays Premier League 2010/2011 - A Quick Preview
by The Stinger on Aug.14, 2010, under Football
2. ManCiti
3. Arselol
4. ManUre
5. Liverwurstpool
6. Rottenham
7. Villa
8. EverTimmeh
9. Fulham
10. Small Heath Alliance
11. Wigan
12. Stoke
13. Sunderland
14. Newcastle
15. West Ham
16. Bolton
17. Blackburn
18. Wolves
19. West Bomb Alquaeda
20. Blackpool
FA Cup: ManCiti
League Cup: Villa
Champions League: Barca
Europa: Juve
First Manager Bye Bye: Martinez
Top Scorer: Drogba
Best Signing: Joe Cole
Worst Signing: Anyone from Liverpool
How many ManCiti players will request a transfer in January because they aren’t getting any game time: Lots.
Shaquille Becomes A Jolly Green Giant
by The Stinger on Aug.08, 2010, under American, Basketball
Shaquille O’neal was this week announced as the newest addition to the Boston Celtic’s All-Star Cavalcade Of Future Hall Of Famers Retirement Tour. That’s not to say that this team won’t be competitive, far from it. They have over 50 combined All-Star appearances on their roster and they can all still play.
But they are not getting any younger and other teams are getting better, most notably Miami. Shaq is becoming a bit of a journeyman in his latter years, this being his fourth different team in four years. He has been signed by teams like Phoenix and Cleveland who believed his experience could help them get to the championship.
However Shaq is now more likely to get the final piece of pizza rather than be the final piece in the championship puzzle. Boston had their final shot at a title with this team last season and came up a few games short against the Lakers. This should be the last year for this group as it stands now.
And Shaq, stop hurting your legacy and just retire at the end of this season. You do not want to be Michael Jordan finishing up your days as an ageing superstar trying to get a rubbish team to be less rubbish and failing.
Ilya Kovalchuk - The Saga Continues
by The Stinger on Aug.03, 2010, under American, Other Sports
For those who came in late, Ilya Kovalchuk was traded during the middle of last season from Atlanta to the New Jersey Devils. He became a much sought after commodity during the off-season and was actively pursued by many a NHL club, most notably Los Angeles.
But the New Jersey management came up with a brilliant plan. Offer Ilya the most overblown and convuluted deal in history, $102 million over 17 years. Now, at 27 years old this would mean his contract would end when he is 44. Sure there have been the odd player that has been able to go into their 40’s but it is a little ridiculous.
That is until you read the part where his wage is scaled from almost $10million a year down to the base rate in his final 5 years. This gave the overall contract a lower average yearly salary to help fit into the NHL salary cap. This is where the NHL stepped in and said we don’t like these shennanigans.
But the NHL Players Association countered with “But why?” and now we are headed to arbitration. This is usually a quick process but for some reason there was no arbitrator in place at the time (why would there be, it’s only mad trading month). So, finally tomorrow the decision will be at least discussed.
There are teams hanging on the verdict, again most notably The Kings who are ready to pounce on Ilya should his contract be vetoed and torn up. It’s not like this is the first lengthy contract though. I think what the NHL are concerned about is the fact that while The Devils are paying Ilya huge money, they still comfortably fit under the cap.
Then when the final 5 years comes around and he is 39, New Jersey then can cut him and pay out the relatively paltry sum of $2.5m of the rest of his contract and also recover about $7m in their cap space. You can see both sides. The club wants to work their contracts as they see fit to help their club and the NHL wants to stop rorting of the system.
Will be interesting to see how this plays out.
2010/2011 Hyundai A-League Season Preview
by The Stinger on Aug.02, 2010, under Australian, Football
A brand new Hyundai A-League season begins on Thursday complete with a brand new team, the Melbourne Heart. There have been changes a plenty over the off-season, new managers have entered, goalkeepers have been moving around left, right and center and Australian players have returned from their time with overseas clubs.
So, who will win this season? Can Sydney do the double or will a brand new champion such as Perth or Wellington be crowned? Let’s have a look shall we.
ADELAIDE UNITED
Last season was, to put it mildly, an unmitigated disaster. The inability to put the ball in the net on a consistant basis was the chief reason for their dramatic slide down the ladder. So they went out and got the best available striker they knew could perform in this league, Serginho van Dijk.
He has already proven his worth during The Reds encouraging Asian Champions League campaign where they managed to make it to the round of 16 where they were beaten in extra time by Korean outfit Jeonbuk Motors.
We had a brief glimpse of Argentinian playmaker Marcos Flores at the end of last season and during the ACL and he looks like he can provide the midfield polish that United were sadly lacking last season. But the biggest off-season change was with the manager.
Aurelio Vidmar ended his association with The Reds after the ACL campaign to take up a role with the national team. He has now been replaced by Dutch coach Rini Coolen. Coolen has experience in the European leagues, having played and managed there and will bring some new tactics to the Adelaide squad, including a 4-3-3 formation if the pre-season has been anything to go by. (continue reading…)
The Top Ten Newspaper Headlines During The World Cup*
by The Stinger on Jul.18, 2010, under Football
*Newspapers may or may not be real.
10. The Kim Jong Il Times, North Korea - 23 People Shot And Killed During Welcome Home Ceremony For North Korean Football Team.
9. The Montevideo Sun, Uruguay - New Goalkeeper Suarez Keeps Uruguay In World Cup
8. The Springbok Sentinel, South Africa - The Johannesberg Symphony Orchestra To Add Vuvuzela To Lineup.
7. USA Today, USA - United States Lose In Round Of 16, America Loses Interest In World Cup.
6. The London Times, England - Emile Heskey Announces Retirement From International Football, Looks Forward To Just Being Rubbish At Club Level.
5. The Dublin Report, Ireland - France Go Out At The Group Stage - Take That You Cheating Bastards!
4. The Berlin Bugle, Germany - England Receive Karma For 1966 - Take that You Cheating Bastards!
3. The Wildebeest Weekly, Nigeria - Sani Kaita Apologises For Red Card, Asks For Fans Bank Account Details So He Can Compensate Them.
2. The Madrid News, Spain - Spain Wins World Cup, Fans Believe A Glitch Has Occurred In The Matrix.
1. The Dutch Herald, Holland - Fried Octopus Hottest Menu Item In Dutch Restraunts.
Happy Birthday Dad.
by The Stinger on Jul.13, 2010, under Other Sports, Uncategorized
Today is my father’s birthday, so Happy Birthday dad. My love of sport comes from him. He introduced me to so many different sports and helped give me a overall enjoyment of all sports.
He came from a big family and all of them loved their footy, especially growing up not far from the Footscray football club ground. Sure, he took me to a few Footscray games but he never pressured me to follow them and I ended up choosing my own team, St Kilda. As long as the Bulldogs aren’t playing the Saints, he will enjoy them as well just for me.
Dad got me into two other sports in a big way when I was little, Ice Hockey and Soccer. My dad had played Hockey for a while and I learned to skate soon after I could walk. I ended up playing in the Ice Mice and because my dad was a goalie, I guess they thought I should be one too. Turns out I wasn’t very good. Oh well.
I started playing Soccer in my first year in Primary School. I loved it and it was the one sport I was pretty good at. I also loved watching it, either on the telly or going to see Adelaide City play at Hindmarsh Stadium. We now both go and watch our Adelaide United in the A-League.
We both support Aston Villa but our other teams are pretty different. I like Inter Milan and he is a Juventus man for one. I’m Rangers and he is Celtic, now that’s a toughy. He doesn’t really have an NHL team but I’m a devoted Pittsburgh Penguins fan.
We do differ on some sports. I really like Basketball but dad is a little noncommittal on it. We have many a great conversation on different events happening around the world, whether it be Casey Stoner winning another MotoGP race or how much of a prat Ronaldo is.
All I’m really trying to say is thanks dad for introducing me to the wonderful world of sport and all it has to offer. Happy Birthday.
The Weirdest Olympic Sports In History
by The Stinger on Jun.23, 2010, under Other Sports
Throughout the history of the modern Olympic Games many sports have come and gone. Some events were merged or incorporated with others, but other sports were banished altogether. There are many sports that were given a go and either through lack of participating countries or just flat out strangeness, they had to be let go.
Here are some of the strangest, including some weird demonstration sports at the Olympics.
TUG OF WAR - This was contested at six Olympics and now at every church picnic. I am certain there was the most unathletic looking fat guy walking around with a gold medal after he was used as an anchor by the winning team.
ROPE CLIMB - This race to the top starred at five Games. I wonder if there was a short, stocky guy with a tight shirt and a whistle standing at the base of the rope calling the competitors names for doing it too slow? Mr Reid, how I miss you… (continue reading…)
FIFA World Cup - Refereeing At Its Worst?
by The Stinger on Jun.22, 2010, under Football
The 2010 FIFA World Cup has been hit by a spate of at the very least, questionable decisions being made by the match referees. Sure, the actual football has at times been on the wrong side of good but the officials are making it hard for teams to play. (continue reading…)
2010 FIFA World Cup - Round 1 Review
by The Stinger on Jun.17, 2010, under Football
Well, the first round of matches in this years World Cup are done and dusted and there were a few thrills and some bigger spills, especially from big guns Spain and England.
Best Performance - Argentina’s defeat of Nigeria - It would be easy to say Germany’s demolition of Australia but two of their goals came after Cahill was sent off (more on that later). Argentina monstered the Nigerian team with some slick movement and if not for some outstanding heroics from goalkeeper Vincent Enyeama they would have won by about 6-0.
Worst Performance - France’s draw with Uruguay - Uruguay are not a bad team, but France were just ordinary. They only just scraped into the World Cup and on that performance they are really lucky to be there. They will have to pick up their game a whole lot to make something happen in this tournament.
Worst Goalkeeping Blunder - Rob Green v USA - I think enough has been said about this monumentous gaffe so I will let Rob slink away in peace to the end of the bench while Calamity James takes his spot.
Best Goal - Maicon v North Korea - Whether he meant it or not is up for debate but there is no doubt it was an amazing shot with this new ball. I choose to believe he meant it.
Worst Decision - Tim Cahill’s Red Card - I don’t know what Marco Rodriguez saw in the incident but he was very harsh on the Aussie midfielder. It was a sliding challenge from behind but Cahill pulled his leg out of it and his momentum helped slide his knee into the leg of Schweinsteiger. Even Bastian said that it was not a red card offence. Let’s hope that FIFA do the right thing and leave it at a one match ban.
Biggest Controversy - The Jabulani Ball - It was a toss up between the ball and those damn horns but the ball is really affecting the quality of play on the pitch and the number of goals being scored. Too many times the ball has played an integral part in a botched move.
Biggest Surprise - North Korea - I could have said Switzerland or the US or New Zealand for their performances but North Korea proved that they will not be the pushover that everyone thought they would be before the tournament. I look forward to seeing how they go against Portugal and Ivory Coast.
So far it has been an interesting tournament and I look forward to some more exciting play than we have gotten so far.








